A Sad Sad Little Boy
by Panda-chan the Bulbasaur
Summary: This is the story of Neji Hyuuga's life. Sorry if fans of Neji do not like it... but oh well. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**A Sad Sad Little Boy**

**Chapter One**

This story was created by Crystal (aka Hynatta-Rocks24) and the awesome me Panda! We're sorry that Neji is a wimpy retard in this story. Go Hinata and other people from Naruto! Anyway enjoy the random story.

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One day Neji Hyuuga was playing boxing on his Nintendo wii. Then Hinata came to join. It got so violent that Hinata knocked Neji out.

"Uh oh" Hinata said with a look of damn-i'm-dead-unless-I-get-rid-of-the-evidence-or-use-my-inosence-to-get-myself-out-of-this on her face.

Hiashi, Hinata's dad for those of you who don't know, came in and saw Neji out cold on the ground.

"Now Hinata what have I told you about knocking Neji out." Hiashi said while staring at Neji.

"Sorry daddy he was just in my way." Hinata replied innocently.

Hanabi, Hinata's sister, came in and said, "OMG is Neji finally dead? I mean it's about time."

Hinata looked at Hanabi and replied, "No he's not dead we're not that lucky Hanabi."

"Oh darng." Hanabi said getting a little pissed at that.

"Are you two hungry?" they're father asked.

"Yes" both Hanabi and Hinata replied.

So they leave Neji at home...out cold...on the floor. Then the next day Neji was still on the floor...out cold...totally ignored by everyone. Sasuke and Naruto came to see Hinata cause it's her birthday.

"Wow I never knew how retarded Neji was!" Naruto said out of nowhere.

"How is he retarded?" Sasuke asked.

"He's laying on the floor, duh you chicken ass." Naruto answered.

"Naruto at Kiba's birthday you called to lay on the floor so that would make you a retard." Sasuke explained.

"But I'm a very sexy retard!" Naruto defended.

"Dobe." Sasuke says under his breath.

Hinata came in the room thinking that Neji was finally awake.

Naruto saw her and said, "Hey Hinata, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Hinata blushed, "Thanks Naruto. Hey where is Sakura?"

"She's raping little kids." Naruto answered seriously.

"Don't listen to him that's not true. She's with Ino, Tenten and Temari. She said they're meeting some 'sexy guys' or something like that."

Naruto got a confused look, "How do you know that?"

"She told both of us after training this morning when team 10 walked by us." Sasuke answered.

Neji finally woke up hearing this, "What crawled up his ass?"

Naruto replied, "A pencil." sad thing is he looked serious about it.

Hinata, Neji and Sasuke all screamed, "WTF!?"

Sasuke screamed loud enough for all of Konoha to hear, "A pencil? Why a fuckin pencil?"

"Don't know saw it on TV once. "Naruto replied with a straight face.

"You're gay Naruto!" Sasuke screamed.

"At least I didn't go out with Michael Jackson to see Barney...Live!" Naruto screamed back.

"How the hell did you find out about that?" Sasuke said not screaming now.

Naruto got a look of confusion on his face, "That was true? I thought I just made that up."

Sasuke got embarrassed and said, "Dammit" and walked out.

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Thanks for reading my retarded story. Please review and tell me if I should make more chapters. 


	2. Chapter 2

**A Sad Sad Little Boy**

**Chapter 2**

Ok people I'm back with chapter two of this story with the retarded Neji. Well enjoy!

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"So Naruto why did you two come over here anyway?" Neji asked while getting off the ground.

"We came to see Hinata for her birthday, you silly sleepy head." Naruto replied with the biggest smile he could possibly have.

Neji looked at Hinata with a look of confusion "Its your birthday?"

Hinata just nodded her head yes.

"Well why aren't you having a party to celebrate?" Neji asked while going to turn the wii on to play _Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi__2_

Naruto took the liberty of just answering for Hinata "Neji the party isn't until 6 o'clock tonight."

"hn" was all Neji could say.

"Dude can I play too." Naruto asked loudly.

"Don't you have to be somewhere?" Neji asked getting ticked off that he was still here.

"No." Naruto replied happily and took a wii controller (or remote if that's what you want to call it and they already have the nun chuck)

Hinata went and sat on the couch to watch them kill each other.

"I think I'm gonna be….lets see….how bout Goku." Naruto said.

"Well then I'm gonna be Vegeta." Neji said thinking he's all tuff and stuff like that cause he got Vegeta and Naruto got Goku.

"Oh did you know that Vegeta's last name is Briefs and so like Trunks name is Trunks Briefs and Bulma is the same way and so it like totally weird and I like cheese. Did you know that Barney is a dinosaur and that he's like purple and green. Do you like gypsies? They're weird. I watched Dr.Phil the other day and he's bald. Do you like fudge? I like fudge. Neji do you like ramen? I love ramen! My favorite ramen is well all of them. Oreos are good too. So what's your favorite color? I like orange." Naruto said like those blond girls that like go like oh my god and like never like shut up.

"O.O" both Neji and Hinata were just thinking W…T…F?!

"Ha Neji I just killed you." Naruto said while laughing and pointing at the screen.

"WTF?! WHEN DID WE START THE GAME?!?!?!?!" Neji screamed.

"You silly we just ended."

"PISS OFF NARUTO!"

Naruto looked at Hinata and asked, "What crawled up his ass?"

Hinata shrugged her shoulders and looked at her watch, "Hey you guys we should get to the park for my party its 5:30."

Both Neji and Naruto replied with a "Yes"

So they were off, Neji in the lead with Naruto and Hinata not far behind, oh what's this Naruto is about to pass Neji. OMFG HINATA JUST TELEPORTED TO THE PARK?!?! So it looks like we have our winner: HINATA HYUUGA! Anyway they got to the party before everyone and so when everyone started showing up they started the party. (oh and I probably should have mentioned Hinata is turning 17 everyone else is like either 17 or 18)

"Wow you have DJ that's awesome Hinata." Kiba said starting to dance.

Sakura, Ino, Tenten and Temari came over to Hinata and they all screamed "Happy Birthday" at the same time.

Sakura started dancing and Ino joined. Tenten just stood there and said, "I like this song!"

"Yeah me too!" Temari said with a smile "I mean who doesn't like _Teenagers by My_ _Chemical Romance_."

Everyone was dancing and stuff. So about a half hour later they ate the food that was there but Chouji ate the most. After eating they opened presents. Hinata started by opening Kiba's which was a picture frame with dog paws on the border.

"Oh thanks you Kiba I'll put a picture of the team in here." Hinata said with a smile. She opened the next gift from Shino and it was a pair of purple sunglasses.

"Thanks!" She said while putting them on. Next gift was from the three sand siblings; mostly from Temari but still, it was a picture of the three of them in a red frame.

"I love it!" Hinata smiled and gave Temari a hug. The Next gift was from Neji, Hanabi and Hiashi, it was a purple kimono.

"OMFG IT'S BEAUTIFUL!!!" Hinata screamed. The next gift was from both Lee and Gai (or Guy however) and…it…was…a…sex…ed…video. (poor Hinata)

"Um…uh…its…cool…uh…thanks." Hinata said with her eye twitching.

"We're glad you like it!" Gai said giving thumbs up.

"Yeah cause it was either that or a drug video or the new book Gai-sensei wrote!" Lee said happily.

Hinata slowly put the video on the table and went back to her next present and this one is from Tenten and it was a new wii game: _Red Steel_.

"Oh cool thanks Tenten!"

"Hey Hinata can I play that when we get home?" Neji asked.

Hiashi interrupted and told Neji "No Neji it's to mature of a game your not aloud to play it."

Neji just got pissed and shut up. The next gift was from Ino and it was a pair of purple flip-flops.

"Thanks!"

The next gift was from Shikamaru and he got her a pair of earrings.

"Thank you Shikamaru!" (lets just say Hinata wears earrings now)

The next present was from Chouji, which was a bag of chips.

"Thanks!"

The next present was from Naruto, Sakura…ok I'm just going to say team 7. The gift was a picture of team 7 in a purple frame and she also got a 50 of gift certificate for the spa.

"Oh wow thanks guys!"

Now that the party was over and everything was cleaned up everyone went home and because it was late (lets go with like midnight) went to sleep in their warm beds. Except for one person: Neji Hyuuga. Dun dun dun!

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Well I know this chapter was well short and stupid but that's the story and crap but we're all going to have to deal with it aren't we. So please review! 


	3. Chapter 3

**A Sad Sad Little Boy**

**Chapter 3**

Sorry this was a really late update on this story. Panda just didn't really feel like updating it. Well enjoy! Meow :3

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Neji, being the retarded person that's the only one awake, started to head downstairs to the living room to play red steel. As he was walking to the room of living, he saw some portraits. "Dude! My dad looked like a man on weed in tha…oh wait that's just me." So after that…awkward moment…Neji started for the living room…again(a/n ok how long does it take for one person to get to the room of living. Meow :3) and turned on the T.V. Neji saw that the _Teletubies_ was on and the volume was as loud as it can possibly get. "So this is why it wasn't on yesterday! Its only on at 4:00a.m. And people expect fans to be up this early…retards."

"NEJI LEONARD HYUUGA! DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS!?!" (a/n that's not really Neji's middle name. Meow :3)

Neji didn't pay any attention to his pissed off uncle and continued to watch _Teletubies_. "WOAH NO WAY IT'S A NEW EPISODE! This is better than _Go Diego Go_!"

Hiashi, being pissed as he is, took the controller and pressed the power button.

"I HATE YOU BARNEY!"

"NEJI WHAT THE HELL!?"

Neji just turns around, "Oh…uh…hi uncle."

"Neji go to bed." Hiashi said getting stressed about Neji.

Neji just glared at Hiashi and walked off. Then Neji started mumbling something like "Stupid Barney turning _Teletubies _off."

Hiashi then just went back up to his room to sleep.

The next day Hinata was first to awake. She took a shower and did the usually teeth brushing and all the stuff people do in the morning. So after she ate some breakfast she went to play _Red Steel_. "This is gonna be so…"

"HINATA VANILLA HYUUGA! GO CLEAN YOUR ROOM!"

"Damn you dad, damn you."

Hiashi walked in "What did you say Hinata?"

"Nothing."

"Good now go!"

So Hinata had to turn off the wii and everything and went to clean her room.

"Hinata, Kiba called and said you have a team meeting at the ramen shop." Neji said very quickly and then walked off cause he wanted the last of the kool-aid. Hinata just left the house and went to the ramen shop place thing without even cleaning her room. She didn't see Kiba, Shino or Kurenia anywhere.

"Yo Hinata!"

Hinata instantly knew who it was. "Hello Kiba!"

"Awesome party you had last night the food was great!"

"Arf"

"Hello Akamaru and thank you Kiba."

Shino popped outa know where like the scary guy he is. "Why are we here?"

Kiba just stared off to the distance for a while then answered, "I. Don't. know."

Hinata took the liberty as to of offering the guys to hang out at the ramen shop so they don't feel stupid and just come and go for no reason. So a few hours past and they're still sitting there and Kiba's had about 5 bowls of ramen and is on number 6.

"HELL WITH THIS!" Shino screamed.

"Right so…now what?" Hinata asked hoping for an answer, but to just reseve Shino leaving and Kiba about to leave. "Hey Kiba don't leave me here alone."

"Sorry Hinata. I gotta go watch Hana's dogs tonight."

Hinata just felt alone so she decided to go clean that room of hers. Few more hours have passed and hinata's room was now clean (a/n yeah she appeared at the house magically. Meow :3). "Maybe I can finally play _Red Steel _without interruptions." So she made her way down to the living room. As she was walking, she saw some portraits. "Dude! Hanabi looked like a constipated man in tha…oh wait that's just Neji trying to smile." So Hinata just continued and before she knew it she was standing in the living room where she saw Neji playing _Red Steel_. "NEJI LEONARD HYUUGA MESS UP MY SAVED DATA OF THAT GAME I'LL BEAT YOUR ASS TO THE GROUND!"

Neji just stood there frozen where he was. He didn't dare move a step when Hinata was in that mood. But eventually after a few seconds he got the courage to just continue playing.

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Ok yeah its really short and no point but its late and Panda is tired. Well thanks for reading. 


	4. Chapter 4

**A Sad Sad Little Boy**

**Chapter 4**

Ok well here's another chapter of _A Sad Sad Little Boy_. Panda-chan know, "Why is she still writing this story when its going no where?" YEAH WELL PANDA-CHAN BORED! Enjoy! Meow :3

As Neji continued playing _Red Steel_,with Hinata watching, they were unaware that the game Neji was playing, was secretly overwriting Hinata's game. "Neji! Let me play it's my game!"

"Hinata let me keep playing!"

"NEJI! DID YOU FINISH OFF THE KOOL-AID!?"

"N-N-No"

Hiashi came into the room, "DAMN YOU NEJI! YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE THAT USUALLY DRINKS IT! GO TO THE STORE THAT'S 20 MILES AWAY AND GET MORE KOOL-AID!"

Neji, being angry as he is, gave the wii remote to Hinata. "Thankies Neji!" So, then Hinata started playing. And she had loads of fun… woo.

_Meanwhile with Neji and his journey to getting more kool-aid…_

"_Over the hills and far away,_

_Teletubbies come to play ..._

_Time for teletubbies,_

_time for teletubbies,_

_time for teletubbies..._

_Tinkywinky. "Tinkywinky!"_

_Dipsy. "Dipsy!"_

_Laalaa. "Laalaa!"_

_Po. "Po!"_

_Teletubbies. "Teletubbies!"_

_Say, Heeeeee-lo! "Eh-oh!"_

_Tinkywinky. Dipsy. Laalaa. Po._

_Teletubbies. "Teletubbies!"_

_Say Heeeeeee ... "Uh-oh!"_

_"Where have the teletubbies gone ?_

_Where have the teletubbies gone?_"

"Neji?"

Neji quickly turned around, "Um… H-Hey Tenten…. Uh what are you doing here?"

"Neji my house is right down this road."

"Riiight you think that." Neji replied starting to walk away.

"What the fuck." Tenten said watching as Neji was walking away on his journey to getting kool-aid.

Anyway after that awkward moment… Neji just continued on with his most reasonable journey to get kool-aid from a store that's 20 miles away at 11:59 p.m. "I'm bored again… and I still have ways to go until I get to the damn store." Neji turned into an alleyway and started taking it.. and supposedly it's a short cut to the store.

"It ain't easy being cheesy."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! OMG OMG MOLESTER MOLESTER!!!!!!!!!!" Yeah and of course being the freak Neji is screamed at the top of his lungs… like a girl… how manly.

Chester the cheetah came outa the dark shadow of the alleyway, "Hey relax man. Didn't mean to scare ya."

"OH YEAH! Don't worry we wont hurt you."

Neji stared blankly at the gignormous jar thing of kool-aid, "YOU!"

The _OH YEAH _dude stared at Neji, "Chester what did you give 'im."

"Nothing…. Yet…. he has pretty hair." Chester said randomly while petting Neji's hair.

"I SHALL TAKE YOU HOME SO I DON'T HAVE TO WALK 20 FUCKIN MILES TO A STORE THAT'S NAME IS STORE! AND THEN YOU'LL KEEP PRODUCING KOOL-AID! ENOUGH TO LAST MY FAMILY AND I A LIFE TIME!"

Both the kool-aid man and Chester the cheetah stared at Neji like he was a mental freak.

"AND YOU!" Neji said pointing to Chester, "YOUR GONNA GO TO AND SUPPLY MEH FAMILY WITH CHEETOS!"

"Oh I like this boy."

Kool-aid man averted his stare from Neji to the cheeto guy, "You like all boys."

"Well will you guys come and supply and nurture my family!?" Neji said… weirdly.

"Dude that sounds wrong." Chester told the Kool-aid man.

Kool-aid man just sighed, "Fine Neji we will go and supply your family with kool-aid and cheetos… as long as we can live in your house!"

"GOOD CAUSE YOU DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE! And I don't care there's extra rooms." Neji turned around bout to leave with the two when he saw Mihawk. "YOU'RE COMING TOO!"

"Why?"

"I dunno you just have a cool hat!" Neji replied.

"Whateve."

"Oh yeah! Now we wont be alone!" The kool-aid man said to Chester the cheetah.

So Neji and the three dudes started walking back to Neji's house (a/n wow how quickly he can get random people that don't know him to fallow him to his house! Meow :3). Then out of nowhere, "My male senses are tingling! Mihawk left randomly!" Neji yelled.

"Male senses?" Both the kool-aid man and Chester asked at the same time.

"Yeah… seems like just last week I started getting them…" Neji said.

"Damn it! Flashbacks here too!" The kool-aid man screamed.

-Deadly flashbacks! The flashbacks that are so deadly! Yay! Cough ok… ok… flashback to last week!-

Neji was walking home peacefully. Then he felt someone following him. He turned around and… "Neji! Its bath time!" The voice said. 

"_What the fuck!?" Neji screamed._

"_I'm your babysitter today!" _

"_O.o Orochimaru… WHY YOU OF ALL PEOPLE!?" _

"_Shh stay quiet and come take you back. And no one will know about what really happy to your actual babysitter… hehehehehehehe." Orochimaru said to Neji in a really creepy voice that could scare the hell out of anyone, and even the Rock. Anyway, then…_

_-End flashback-_

"But I didn't finish!" Neji told them.

"I got scared." The kool-aid man said with a voice of innocence.

"Lets just get home before Hinata tries to mess up my game." Neji told the two while walking. So after a few minutes they got to the house and walked into the room of living where Hanabi, Hinata, and Hiashi were watching the movie _Horton Hears a Who_.

"What the duce Neji!?" Hiashi started, "I ask for kool-aid and you bring the kool-aid man! I didn't even ask for cheetos… or the cheetah!"

"Yeah.. but uncle! Now we have an unlimited supply of kool-aid and cheetos!" Neji fired back at his uncle.

_To be continued cause Panda-chan can't think of anything else and Crystal-chan is waiting for Panda-chan to update it soon…_


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